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If you feel scared by the prospect of divorce, you are not alone. Divorce frightens a lot of people, and this makes it more difficult to discuss issues openly and frankly. Rather, people tend to whisper about it behind closed doors. 

Unfortunately, when people are not upfront about addressing difficult topics like divorce, we have seen this give rise to myths and misconceptions about them. Myths about divorce can make the process unnecessarily complicated. Here are some of the biggest divorce myths and the truth behind them: 

MYTH #1: Only one person is at fault 

California (and other states) offer no-fault grounds for divorce precisely because it is difficult, if not impossible, in most cases to assign blame for the divorce to one partner. Usually, each partner bears at least some of the responsibility for the divorce. If each side owns up to their share of the blame, it can ease matters now and in any future relationships they may have.

MYTH #2: Gender determines who gets spousal support 

Do not assume that the wife will automatically receive spousal support (alimony). Long gone are the days when the wife stayed home to take care of the house and kids while the husband worked to support the family. Now, it is more common for both spouses to work outside the home. Courts base the determination on the amount that each spouse earns and the economic hardship that the divorce will cause them.

MYTH #3: Divorce makes problems go away 

Divorcing your spouse does not necessarily mean that you never have to see him or her again, especially if you have children. Even without kids, ex-spouses often stay intertwined in each others lives because of joint ownership of a business, shared friends and common interests. While you may never mend the rift that developed during your marriage, it will help to learn how to be around each other, even it happens only occasionally. 

Bust these and other myths by getting the correct information you need to prepare for, get through and move on from your divorce. With the right help, you will not only survive, you may be able to thrive after it’s all over.