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The realities of divorce

Though you may not imagine your divorce will be pleasant, your expectations might still be sugar-coated. Divorce brings many harsh realities that aren't always easy to accept.

The sooner you're able to come to terms with the following, the easier it will be to cope with the long road ahead.

There’s no discount divorce

Methods of discount divorce certainly exist, but they probably aren’t saving you money or time in the long run. Choosing not to hire an attorney, filing for divorce using online services or attempting to ignore a divorce altogether aren't in your best interests.

Without professional legal representation and counsel, you risk making mistakes, forgetting important details and agreeing to a bad deal. Ignoring your divorce, on the other hand, leaves the court with no option but to make decisions about your assets according to your ex-spouse's divorce petition.

On average, divorce costs between $15,000 and $30,000 after attorney fees, court fees and mediation fees.

It doesn’t happen overnight

Each divorce’s time requirement is different, depending mainly on whether children are involved or a high amount of assets are being divided. The process can take about 6 weeks or over a year.

For those using mediation, less time can be spent in court. However, sessions can vary in length depending on negotiations. They also could take longer if there are scheduling conflicts between spouses.

You’ll only get what’s given to you

Many times, those who consider divorce have an idea of how their assets should be divided. But, unless you have a prenuptial agreement, the value and division of your assets will likely be left to state law and the discretion of the court.

Misconceptions about the division of marital property are common. For example, if one spouse bought an animal prior to the marriage, that spouse is entitled to keep the animal because it is considered separate property. However, if the same spouse bought a second animal during the marriage, the court would likely grant the “marital property” animal to the other spouse, so that each person gets an animal.

This example also goes to show that the courts exercise no empathy while dividing assets. Instead, all property — including animals — should be divided objectively and equitably between the two.

There’s no winner

The end of a divorce is hardly ever celebrated in victory. Yet, it's common for spouses to compete against one another to win the divorce. The more likely result is that neither get exactly what they wanted. Life following the divorce may also present many challenges and struggles — especially if kids are involved.

If you are considering divorce, these realities might be a tough pill to swallow. However, seeking the help of a skilled lawyer can make a big difference in the legal complexities weighing on your shoulders. A good divorce lawyer will keep your expectations in check while also ensuring you walk away with a fair deal in the end.

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